This week was just a bad week. One of those that just seems like the same old stuff, different day. After day. After day. It seems like by 10:00 a.m. we (meaning me and the boys) had already decided we were just bugging each other and then it went downhill from there. And it's pretty much all my fault for being so crabby and then feeling sorry for myself that I don't have any family around to help out sometimes. I have a lot of redeeming to do after being such a lame mom this week. Sometimes it's just hard! But then today, when CJ's school headmaster got him out of the car on "Western Day," he turned around and said to me, "See ya later pardner!" And my heart melted.
As I watched him walk in with his cowboy gear (including the chaps he insisted he needed so we hastily cut up a pair of old jeans and 'wrangled' them on with a belt), AND his new sneakers (he still wanted to run fast at recess) - I just sort of choked up and took a moment to capture that sweet little image in my mind. He's getting so big, so fast - but at the same time, moments like this remind me how little he still is. And I need to be way more patient with this oldest little man of mine.
I love my boys more than anything in the world and it's moments like today that I realize it won't be long before they won't want to hold my hand, sit on my lap, snuggle in the big chair and beg me to play with them. So here's to a new week and a better mommy. I am determined to do a better job and avoid damaging their little spirits by not fully investing myself in them.